“I decided to wage a land war in Russia, and although I did not succeed, at least I tried. Unfortunately, I was aggressive when I should have laid low. What fun is winning if you're not bragging, though? What makes me the angriest is the fact that I cannot complain about my rolling. The loss was caused by my failure to turn in my set of cards when trying to finish off Marty. At least I didn't let Ron win in the Ukraine, thereby echoing Captain Ahab in my futility: 'From hell's heart I stab at thee: for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee!', and with that, I cast the fatal harpoon...”
